Marcella - thank you for articulating this so well. I’m still grappling with how much this diagnosis has permeated every aspect of my life. The happy moments, as you noted, and the challenging ones too. A toddler meltdown compounded by guilt of having to be firm with my little guy because I’m trying to make the most of all my time with him. The nagging thought at the back of my mind that maybe the meltdown is because of him trying to come to terms with mommy having cancer - unlikely but I can’t help but think it.
I feel that all of the time. When I was in treatment, I definitely saw a mirroring of behavior in my son, especially in the depths of chemo (like during AC). School called and said he kept saying he was tired, and he didn’t want to participate, and he wanted to go home. And I know it was because that he was processing everything he was seeing. He was only three years old- what else was he supposed to do? It was one of the hardest parts of treatment.
Marcella - thank you for articulating this so well. I’m still grappling with how much this diagnosis has permeated every aspect of my life. The happy moments, as you noted, and the challenging ones too. A toddler meltdown compounded by guilt of having to be firm with my little guy because I’m trying to make the most of all my time with him. The nagging thought at the back of my mind that maybe the meltdown is because of him trying to come to terms with mommy having cancer - unlikely but I can’t help but think it.
I feel that all of the time. When I was in treatment, I definitely saw a mirroring of behavior in my son, especially in the depths of chemo (like during AC). School called and said he kept saying he was tired, and he didn’t want to participate, and he wanted to go home. And I know it was because that he was processing everything he was seeing. He was only three years old- what else was he supposed to do? It was one of the hardest parts of treatment.
Thank you so much for sharing, I feel every word you wrote. It resonates so much.